Since I've had two previous c-sections my OB, Dr. Juarez decided that it would be best to schedule the surgery instead of waiting for me to labor on my own. I was disappointed because having my body start labor on it's own is about the closest thing I can get to experiencing a regular delivery but understanding the risks involved as well as knowing that my discomfort from the pregnancy would end sooner than later made scheduling much easier.
We scheduled the big day on Tuesday, February 5th, 10 days before my due date. I was grateful that the hospital approved the date as Kam's group was on OB allowing for one of his associates to be the one doing my block. I felt really comfortable with the plans made and was surprised by my lack of anxiety leading up to the big day. However as I was getting ready the morning of, every emotion possible flooded through me leaving me feeling overwhelmed and unsure. I was excited and scared and in disbelief that the big day had finally arrived.
Just outside of the Hospital: St. Rose Dominican, Siena
I was already preregister but I did have to sign some paperwork and then I was able to get changed and prepped for the Surgery. The boys were really tender wanting to be near me and see everything that was happening. While we waited for our turn in the OR Kam and my mom took the boys to get some breakfast.
Then it was time. We were scheduled for a 9:30 start but Dr. Juarez was ready early so we headed back just before 9. I gave the boys kisses and hugs before heading back and it was at that moment that it hit me: we were having a baby! My eyes filled with tears and I was overcome with emotion knowing how much I loved my little boys.
Once in the OR I really started to get nervous. Kam was great at helping me relax and I felt grateful that he was able to consult with Natalie, the CRNA doing my block, to be sure I had a better experience with the drugs. With Carter the Anesthesiologist, who was a real jerk by the way, gave me too much medicine and because of it I felt like I couldn't breath and really struggled. This time though, the dosage was perfect, I was still uncomfortable but was able to relax and enjoy the experience so much more.
It seemed as though hardly any time had passed when I heard it. At 9:19 AM (PST) my baby girl was here and she was SCREAMING! I loved hearing her wail, letting us know that she was here.
I was completely overcome with emotion and started to cry immediately. I was so excited. The nurse gave me a quick peek at her before taking her to clean her up and I couldn't believe how beautiful she was.
After she was cleaned up Kam was able to cut the cord.
Then they wrapped her up in preparation to take her to the transitional nursery. I wasn't too excited about my baby and my hubby leaving me while I finished getting stitched up, but before leaving, the nurse brought her over and laid her little cheeks next to mine. I loved how warm and soft she was. Her cheeks felt like little puffy cloud pillows. I loved kissing her and feeling her warmth on me. I felt much more comfortable with her leaving my side after this incredible experience.
In the nursery, baby girl was weighed and measured:
8 lbs. 3.4 oz.
20 inches long.
It wasn't long before I was all stitched up and headed back to the recovery room. Normally they don't let anyone in the recovery room for at least an hour but my nurse was so awesome she let the boys and my parents come in. I was only in the the room for a minute when Kam and baby girl joined us. It was so fun to watch as the boys gazed on their sister for the very fist time. They were so happy.
They only got to look at her for a few minutes since the nurse wanted to let me bond with her skin to skin. This was a first for me. With the boys I didn't do skin to skin, not sure why, and I was thrilled to get to have this experience. It was better than I thought it would be. I loved her being next to me, and I was amazed at her natural instinct to move herself to begin nursing. I relished the moment and only because Braden had to leave to go to school did I give her up to let him and everyone else get to hold her before leaving.
Once they left though, I had her placed her right back for more skin to skin time. She probably nursed for nearly 3 hours straight. Kam returned from showing my parents where to drop Braden off at school and getting some lunch and we were able to have some alone time together with our new daughter. She also got her first bath during this time too. Later in the day after they moved us up to our permanent room the boys returned with Grammy to see sister.
The days that followed were almost a blur. I wish I could say that I liked my time in the hospital but I didn't. The first night I didn't sleep at all and the next day there were so many people in and out of a my room that it felt like a zoo. My dad came and stayed with me for the day since Kam was working and his presence helped to calm me and I was able to relax, but unfortunately I still couldn't sleep. Despite being so tired and hating all the interruptions I did love bonding with my little girl.
My second night in the hospital was by far the worst. I had let Kam go home and sleep the first night since I knew he was beat. I felt comfortable with my nurse and knew that I could handle being alone. The second night I wasn't as confident. I was so tired but I knew that Kam wasn't excited about sleeping in an uncomfy bed so I let him go home. That was a big mistake. Kam and I had a wonderful dinner together and we talked to my night nurse and discussed what could be done to help me sleep since I was sleep deprived. She decided that giving me some bennadryl would not only help the itchiness from my medication but help me to relax enough to sleep. Unfortunately the opposite happened and on top of it all, I began to hallucinate. It was the wort feeling ever. I couldn't grasp reality and my mind was going crazy thinking up the most horrible things. I would nearly relax and about fall asleep when I'd have a second long nightmare that would wake me. I even remember thinking that dying would be better than feeling how I did. It seemed at though hours had passed and yet it also felt like no time had passes at all when I heard Riley crying wanting to eat again. In my mind I wasn't ready for her to be awake and just wanted her to rest longer so that I could hopefully get some sleep. I was able to pull myself out of my crazy state to comprehend what time it was and after realizing that it had been nearly 3 hours from the time I fed her last and it really was time for her to eat I was able to pull myself together to get up to take care of my baby. I changed her diaper and after bundling her back up she became so calm. I stood there looking at her little face and falling even more in love with her as I realized that all I needed to escape the nightmare I was having was knowing that I was her mommy and that she needed me. A calm came over me and even though I was tempted to call Kam to come help me, I didn't and the rest of the night, although still sleepless, was much better.
I was thrilled when on the second morning Dr. Juarez said I could go home later that day. I was so grateful that he didn't make me stay knowing that going home would finally bring the rest I so desperately needed. My room was also much quieter with less people in and out. Kam was working but had several breaks during the day where he was able to come up and visit us.
It was around 4 when we finally were able to go home. Braden came with Kam to bring us home. It was the same day as his 100 day party and he was still dressed up as an old man. The nurses thought he was absolutely adorable and it made for a memorable visual of our going home.
I am so grateful Riley is a part of our family; our family feels complete with her. I am also so very grateful to my parents who each came to welcome Riley and help out with the boys while I was in the hospital. They each did so much. It was wonderful to know that the boys were with their favorite people and I especially loved coming home to a clean house!
Happy Birthday Riley! We LOVE you.
2 comments:
Sounds like a wonderful experience besides the sleep deprivation. Glad you are home and doing well! By the way, I am so jealous of the way you look when you delivered, I always look like a puffy balloon!
She is beautiful!!!! Congratulations!
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